The boring green stuff....

I dislike talking about money. It's always been a source of annoyance to me how much Jason likes to talk about it. I've overheard him negotiating literally over dollars at times, and although he enjoys it, it borders on embarrassment for me. Call it pride, call it whatever, but money is always boring to me.

Of course, when you're about to run out of money for an adoption, it tends to excite you a little. Suddenly it becomes very important, and the dollars and cents really matter.

We have used every cent available to us. We have cashed out and/or borrowed from retirement accounts, sold off everything that isn't nailed down (the kids live in constant fear of being "next"), fund raised until we are tired of asking. We have wrung money out of our budget and canceled weekend get-aways. No, we are not living on beans and rice, but that day is fast approaching.

Our most successful fundraiser to date is home made caramel popcorn; at times I've felt like the Dunkin Donuts man: "It's time to make the popcorn"...
We will be at Autumn on the River with the famous popcorn, as well as taking orders up until Christmas. Popcorn money should help with travel expenses and incidentals as we finalize this adoption.

Jason has worked overtime and I've applied to countless prn jobs, only to be ignored by all but one. (Interview for that is pending).

My sweet friend from my high school years-Mindy Thomas Churchill has volunteered to do a quilt raffle fundraiser, more about that to come! Mindy has a large family herself, and they have recently adopted. Read about them http://churchillchronicles.blogspot.com/.

However, despite all our efforts, the issue remains, that we need $3750 when we exit IBESR. We are currently in that office, and God willing, we could be out by the end of October. It is possible. Currently, we have a fraction of that, due to some very kind co-workers of Jason's.

After the $3750 we will need around $3000-4000 more to cover travel costs and pay a USCIS fee when we file our I-600 in Haiti (I know I'm speaking another language now, it's called Adoptionese).

Anyway, although $27,900 has been paid to date, we have around a total of $7600 to go. $7600. At this point it might as well be $76,000.

And I'm not sure where to go from here. I suppose this is where I have to relinquish control and depend on God. That's what's supposed to happen right? But it's so hard when there are two sweet boys waiting, who are my responsibility. I don't believe that God wants me to stop trying, but I do believe He wants me to calm down. To trust. To listen. To stop. To be still.

Lord, teach me your ways. Teach me to trust. Teach me to be still. And please Lord, bring home our boys soon. That's the desire of our hearts. Whatever it takes, that's what we're willing to do.